everything i ever wanted
by BooksHaveSouls
Summary: "Bed," Tessa managed to say in between kisses. Will kissed her neck in response before he pulled her towards the bed.


He sat in the library, lost in thought, a book placed in his lap; the pages

filled with words he did not see. Outside the sun was shining through the

layer of dust and smoke that covered London, making the tall windows shine

bright in the afternoon light.

Will closed his eyes for a moment, his lashes brushing his cheekbones, and

Tessa couldn't help but sigh.

Will immediately opened his eyes. "Something wrong, my love?" he asked, his

voice quiet-almost like a whisper.

"No," Tessa said and smiled, "I'm fine."

A small smile crept onto his lips, his eyes shining. "Kindness is the beauty

of the unknown," Will said, his voice still low, but loving.

"How do you always know what to say?" Tessa asked, her voice a little louder

than his.

"I don't," Will said, but he was still smiling.

"Yes you do, you always know how to make my heart flutter and make me feel

loved." Tessa replies.

"But Tess, you are loved: by everyone," there was a more serious tone in his

voice, but Tessa just smiled.

"Do you know how perfect you are?" she asked him, her hand reaching out and

touching his.

"Well I have been told that I'm quite dashing," Will said with a wink,

smiling one of his rare smiles. Tessa couldn't help but smile back.

They were sitting in the library, across from each other in front of one of

the windows. The fire was low, but it wasn't cold. They were only a week

away from the wedding and Tessa's heart leapt every time she thought about

it. Her dress was almost done, and everything else from the flowers to the

reception afterwards was already in place. Now they just needed the day and

everything would be perfect. Her cheeks almost hurt from all this smiling.

"One week," she whispered under her breath, but even if the words were only

meant for her ears, Will still heard it.

"One week," Will said, reaching over and brushed the tips of his fingers

against her cheek, "Only a week and then you will be all mine."

"All yours," Tessa said, her voice filled with amusement, "I always thought

of myself as my own."

"You are right, you're not mine," Will said, "I'm yours, always and

forever."

Once again Tessa's heart fluttered, Will's words making her feel loved and

cherished.

"Kiss me," Tessa whispered, not sure if he heard. But he was Will and he

would hear everything she would ever say. His lips were upon hers in an

instant, moving in sync with hers. He tasted like lemons and tea and Will,

just like he always did.

Somewhere between the kiss and Tessa gasping for air Will had stood up,

taking Tessa with him; his hands were now in her hair and his lips on her

neck. Tessa made a faint sound of pleasure and for a second she was brought

back to the night under the mountain that she had shared with Will, skin

against skin and lips moving frantically over each other's.

Tessa moved her hands over Will's shoulders, feeling the muscle under the

thin fabric of his shirt. His hands felt hot on hers and even though their

clothes divided them, she still felt the fire radiating between their skin.

"Tess," Will whispered against her skin, his breath tickling her in the most

delightful way. The single word sent a shiver down her spine.

"I love you," he said, the words slipping from his mouth like water from a

waterfall, "More than my own soul, more than my own life."

The words were ordinary, but put together like this was magic-magic so great

that not even a high warlock could do it justice.

Will's lips made a trail of kisses starting at the base of her neck where it

joined the shoulder, over her jaw and finally her mouth. Once again Tessa

could taste Will, the sweetness a wildness of him coloring her taste buds,

filling her whole being.

"I love you too," she whispered against his lips when they drew back to get

air, both of them breathless.

Will's eyes locked with hers; his hand reached out to touch her cheek and

then glided down her throat.

Tessa could feel her heart beat-its thumping the only sound in her head. The

way Will touched her with such tenderness was still a surprise to her. She

wanted to reach up and touch him; to feel his skin under her fingers, when

he suddenly froze.

"What?" Tessa asked, suddenly afraid the she had done something wrong. But

she hadn't, it was the necklace, the jade pendent that Jem had giving her.

It suddenly felt heavy, with the stone almost pressing her down.

"Should I-" Tessa began, but got interrupted by Will.

"Don't," he said, "Please don't." Tessa suddenly realized how broken he

sounded, losing his parabatai had done something to Will and Tessa wasn't

sure she could fix it.

She had tired a lot of things, like asking Charlotte to send him out on

missions, asking Gabriel and Gideon to train with him and asking Cecily to

ask him to train with her or teach her something else. And it helped, but

only for a short time. Sometimes Tessa would catch him staring into the

distance, a faraway look in his eyes. She knew that Will was broken in a way

that only time could repair and yet, it would never be as perfect as before.

"Never take it off," Will said, his voice broke her train of thought.

"Why not?" Tessa asked, the question coming in a breath.

"I want it with you," he said, "I want a piece of him with you, because you

won't forget."

Tessa knew in that instinct what Will meant, it wasn't because he wouldn't

forget, but because she wouldn't die. Somehow in Will's mind it meant that

Jem wouldn't die.

Tessa looked Will in the eye, his dark shining blue ones reminding her of

the midnight sky.

"Come," she whispered, taking his hand and leading him out of the library.

They hadn't been close since the night under the mountain in Wales; it had

been like Will had purposely held himself back. He had kissed her but never

more. She didn't mind though, they were engaged now. Since the wedding night

had been. a little sooner, there wasn't much to look forward to, but now she

wanted to feel that heat again. And maybe it would help Will forget, just

for a moment.

She almost dragged him through the corridors of the Institute, leading him

to his room since it was the closest. She opened his door and pushed him

inside, locking the door behind her with a twist of her wrist.

"Tessa," Will said, a little surprised by the force she had used and her

sudden boldness.

" me try something," Tessa said, the boldness slowly wearing off.

She didn't quite know what to do now, but she supposed that Will would get

the hint and maybe carry on.

She slowly moved forward; she gripped his shirt and reached up on her tip

toes to kiss him. It was slow and a little sloppy, but Will didn't seem to

mind. His hands grabbed her hips, crushing her to him; the desperation from

before pooling into the kiss that had turned wild and more forceful.

Tessa backed up against the door, Will's body pressing into hers, every

angle fitting in with hers. She could feel his hands on her hips, the warmth

seeping in through her clothes. Tessa could feel her heart beating against

her ribs, her blood pumping in her veins. Will's lips left hers; giving her

a chance to breathe, but his lips never left her skin. Instead they made a

trail down her jaw, over her neck and down to her breast where her dress

started. Her breath hitched-the feeling of his lips on her sensitive skin

doing things to her she didn't even know was possible. Tessa lifted her

hands up to Will's shoulders, pulling him closer to her.

A soft noise escaped his mouth and Tessa felt the smile that slowly

stretched across her face; she couldn't believe she was the one to make him

do that.

Tessa gasped when Will's teeth grazed her bare skin, "Tess," he whispered.

his breath sending chills down her spine. Tessa moved her hands to his hair,

buried her fingers in the black silky stands, and pulled slightly and

getting a moan in reward.

"By the Angel, have you any idea what you are doing to me?" Will said, his

lips moving against her skin.

"Mmmm," Was Tessa's response, her mind not able to from any answer that

would make sense to any of them.

She let her hands trail down his chest, feeling the strong muscles under his

shirt. She rather felt than heard his breath hitch.

"Tess," Will drew out her name, "Stop." The word slipped out between his

teeth and it almost sounded as a curse.

"Why?" she asked confusedly, her hands still placed on his abdomen.

"Just," he grabbed her wrists with his hands and placed them down at her

sides, "Give me a second."

"But why?" she asked again, not getting why he wanted to stop-she didn't.

"Because this," he drew in a breath and continued, "Is wrong."

Tessa's eyes widened; the meaning and hurt from his words seeping in.

She looked up at him, her hands slightly shaking. Will looked at her, his

blue eyes looking like flames in the afternoon light that was shining into

the room. Tessa could feel the tears welling up in her eyes and Will must

have seen too, because suddenly his eyes widened too.

"No Tess, that was not how I meant, WE are not wrong," Will cupped her

cheeks with his hands. "We could never be wrong, but we are

doing." He said, and looked into her eyes, blue meeting gray.

"But why?" she asked again, the tears never falling but her eyes were still

wet.

"Because I want you to be an honorable woman," Will said "I want to make

this right."

"Will," Tessa said, "This is right. Don't you understand? I love you, and

the marriage is just a piece of paper, something someone created to make it

official."

Will looked at her; his eyes getting darker by the second.

"But don't you want that?" he asked, his grip on her wrists loosening, "I

want you," Tessa said lustily, "Right now."

She heard him breathe in, his chest rising and falling.

"Don't say it unless you mean it," he said, his tone serious. Instead of

answering Tessa he reached up and kissed him, her lips almost burning his.

She could feel his heart pumping against his chest, the melody of it made

her forget everything else except for him and his hands on her. She tugged

at his shirt; Will got the hint and grabbed the fabric at the hem, releasing

her lips for a second and tore it off.

Tessa let her hands trail over his warm skin, feeling him gasp against her

lips when her fingers reached the top of his trousers. His hands lifted up

her dress, exposing her fair skin. For a second Tessa got nervous, but

quickly dismissed it-this had after all happened before.

She reached up her arms and Will pulled off the dress. She shivered for a

second, the air cooling her skin before Will covered her body with his

again.

"Bed," Tessa managed to say in between kisses. Will kissed her neck in

response before he pulled her towards the bed.

She laid down, Will on top of her, their bodies pressed together perfectly.

Will's hand easily opened her corset, this time he didn't need to ask how to

get it off. The piece of fabric and lace ended up somewhere across the room.

Then finally his hands touched her, really touched her. His trousers soon

disappeared too and skin was gliding against skin, a thin layer of sweat

covering their bodies.

Tessa enjoyed the feeling of Will hovering over her; he was all hard muscle

and firm straight lines, while she was soft and curvy. It was the perfect

mix.

The air filled with their joined breath, the heavy sound of them moving

together leading Tessa into total bliss. Will's hands moved over her

holding, stroking and caressing her in every way possible.

_This_, Tessa thought, _is everything I ever wanted_.

The Moon shone in through the window, bathing them in an almost magical

light. Tessa lay on her stomach facing Will. His features were soft, and

there was no trace of the fierce man he normally was. Tessa reached out and

traced his lips with her fingers, his breath tickling her fingertips. She

smiled to herself; she couldn't believe that she was lucky enough to get to

wake up to this every day for a whole lifetime.


End file.
